My husband kindly tries to get our daughter to let him be the one to help her and he even goes so far as to put on a sweatshirt.

Alas, it’s no use. She snuggles up to my side (I’m currently sleeping with a wedge pillow because pregnancy has given me a wicked case of heartburn. So she is practically sitting up completely in order to be by me).

“Do you need to go potty?” I ask her this, as we always do, and she gives the usual response.

“No.”

So I lead her back to bed, lay on the mat we put on her floor, and hope she will fall asleep soon. She plops onto the mat by me and scoots so close that her face is in my face.

I open my eyes to check if there’s progress towards sleep, and she beams at me.

This happens night after night after night. In the past month, I believe we’ve had 1 uninterrupted night of sleep.

When you have a chronic illness, you NEED sleep. When you’re pregnant, you NEED sleep. Conclusion? I NEED SLEEP.

But I have also chosen to be a mom, and that comes with sacrifices.

The question is, where does sacrifice end and self-neglect begin?

I propose that rather than determining exactly where we are on that spectrum, we should instead focus on what we can control:

Taking care of ourselves!

So my night sleep is interrupted. I can take a nap the next day. (no, it REALLY doesn’t make up for it. But I can’t control if my daughter wakes up or not, and I CAN control if I take a nap).

I had extra chores and errands, and am exhausted. I can sit on the couch and play “tired mom games” with my daughter.

Things like this, taking control of what we can actually control, brings us a greater feeling of confidence and independence.

If instead I refuse to take a nap and spend that time muttering about my bad night of sleep, or I resent my daughter for wanting to play with me and can’t enjoy a moment of it, that brings my overall wellness and quality of life down. I’ve included the serenity prayer below because it perfectly illustrates what I’m talking about.

CHOOSE to take better care of yourself in the small, seemingly insignificant moments.

I have two handouts and a free e-book that help simplify different ways to take care of yourself.

If you need help improving your sleep, click here.

If you want some simplification tips on meal prep, click here.

If you want a free ebook detailing how to reach a more peaceful life, click here.

The post Take Back Control of Your Life For More Joy first appeared on MS and Mo.

For me, vertigo has been an off and on experience. From moments of one split second where the world is spinning to other times when any movement made me throw up.

My first experience with vertigo was the worst time. It was in 2015 during my initial diagnosis. I had just gotten out of the shower when suddenly the world was spinning. I fell to the floor and yelled for my roommate to help me. There was a grocery bag nearby and I threw up into it and stayed on the floor.

For the next 16 hours I threw up each time I moved, but still managed to make it to the couch downstairs. While resting on the couch I kept my eyes closed most of the time while the world continued spinning.

Since that time I have only experienced moments where it feels like my eyes are rolling in their sockets or that I’m standing on a boat during a storm. It lasts no longer than 1 or 2 seconds.

Coping Tips

• Stillness: Holding still is a helpful thing when everything else seems to be roiling around you.
• Breathing through your nose: Vertigo often makes you nauseous, so breathing slowly through your nose keeps you from stimulating your gag reflex.
• Darkness: Reducing the amount of sensory stimulation you’re experiencing can help to reduce the impact vertigo has on you.
• Something cold: Holding something cold gives you something to focus on other than what you’re feeling. Without needing your eyes open!

Vertigo is nasty and difficult. Try some of my tips, check these ones out, or if you have some that work for you please comment and share them (:

The post Dealing With Vertigo While Managing Your Illness first appeared on MS and Mo.

I have seen people with MS post on forums about how hesitant they are to bring up their issues with their doctor because it’s an uncomfortable topic. Let’s be honest.

It’s embarrassing!

No one wants to admit they pooped their pants. Or that they had to rush to the bathroom to urinate 5 times during their 1 hour work meeting.

Especially to someone that you only see every 6 month or less.

So these types of disruptive symptoms go untreated and leave people feeling isolated.

The best thing you can do though, is talk about it.

Because I talked about my embarrassing symptoms, I got a scope done of my throat and stomach and they discovered I had acid from my intestines backing up into my stomach.

Because I talked about my embarrassing symptoms, I was sent to pelvic floor physical therapy and strengthened muscles I didn’t even know existed.

I don’t need to share all of my horror stories to get the point across that courage to share with your doctor about ALL of your symptoms can and will help you to get the treatment you need.

So buckle up buttercup. Be brave and ask for solutions.

The post Two Symptoms People Avoid Mentioning first appeared on MS and Mo.

“Gratitude is the ability to experience life as a gift. It liberates us from the prison of self-preoccupation.”

— John Ortberg

Gratitude is the practice of thankfulness. Thankfulness is in the present moment while gratitude is more all encompassing and longer lasting. In fact, I like to think of the difference being that gratitude is an action we take, while thankfulness is an emotion we feel.

This topic is something that is harped on often enough that it can seem tiring at times. That in and of itself tells us that this is something important that we can’t ignore.

Benefits

There are three benefits to gratitude that I wanted to focus on, with the understanding that there are many, many more benefits that I’m not talking about. Check out my sources if you’d like to see some more comprehensive lists.

1- Gratitude Improves Physical Health

Grateful people report fewer illnesses, pains, and sleep better. They exercise more often which improves heart health and overall wellbeing. Gratitude also reduces the amount of cortisol, the stress hormone, in the body. Stress increases inflammation and overall worsens almost any illness.

2-Gratitude Improves Mental Strength

An article in Psychology Today mentions that Vietnam War veterans who practice gratitude actually report fewer PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder) symptoms. Gratitude also results in greater resilience.

3-Gratitude Improves Mood

Gratitude decreases feelings of depression, resentment, and envy. It increases feelings of happiness, contentment, and awareness of others.

Source 1, 2, 3

How to Practice Gratitude

So now that we know why we should bring gratitude into our lives, how do we do it? Here are a few ideas.

• Keep a gratitude journal where you write a few things daily
• Send thank you notes regularly to people you know
• Express gratitude in the moment (either in your head or verbally)
• Meditate upon the good things in your life

Conclusion

Gratitude is something that can change our lives for the better. Most importantly to remember is that gratitude is a PRACTICE. It’s not something you can perfect overnight. Part of the benefit of gratitude comes from the effort it takes to change and retrain our minds.

Try one of these ideas and let me know in the comments how it went.

The post 3 Benefits of Practicing Gratitude first appeared on MS and Mo.

Benefits

• It helps you control your weight
• Reduces your risk of heart disease and some cancers
• Improves mental health and mood
• Improves sleep
• Helps stabilize blood sugar levels
• Increases energy
• Reduces inflammation
• Produces endorphins, which are natural pain killers

Source 1, 2, 3, 4

Tips

• Start low and slow: this means to start with low effort and increase intensity slowly
• Have a backup plan: you won’t always feel well, and it helps to have an exercise plan for when you aren’t feeling on top of your game
• Have an exercise partner: when you have an exercise buddy they can motivate you when you’re not motivated
• Increase physical activity: physical activity includes things like gardening, cleaning, or even grocery shopping

Conclusion

With autoimmune conditions specifically, overexercising can INCREASE inflammation. So it’s imperative to pay careful attention to signals from your body. This is a balancing act that is well worth the effort.

The post Exercising Even When You Don’t Feel Like It first appeared on MS and Mo.

You let go of your kid for a second and they trip and scuff their knee. Or they grab something that ends up breaking.

Today I was holding my daughter’s hands and she was jumping. I let go of her hands at some point and it must have been too early because she face planted into the hard kitchen floor. Her lip started bleeding and her nose dripped as well.

I. Felt. So. Bad.

The truth is, I technically have some fault in this situation.

But does the feeling of guilt help me? Does it make me more compassionate or a better mom?

No!

It makes guilt my motivation for the actions I take rather than love. This decreases the amount of joy I’m able to feel. Yes it takes care of the little one. But if the little one will be taken care of either way isn’t it better to do so while feeling joy and love?

Think about your motivation. Can you change your mindset to allow a motivation that will bring you greater joy?

The post The One Convicted Has No Guilt first appeared on MS and Mo.

Clinical Depression is on the rampage. In fact, of people with autoimmune diseases 50% have depression or anxiety! 50! Depression has also markedly increased among the general population in the wake of the COVID 19 pandemic getting up to 29% prevalence.

What is it?

The Webster’s Dictionary defines depression as:

“a serious medical condition in which a person feels very sad, hopeless, and unimportant and often is unable to live in a normal way.”

While that definition is okay, it doesn’t quite grasp the wide reach depression can have on all aspects of life and behavior.

To define depression I prefer to look at what symptoms people may experience when dealing with clinical depression.

Common Symptoms

• feeling sad, irritable, on edge, angry, or numb
• passivity and loss of interest in activities
• appetite/weight changes (this could be eating more than usual OR eating less than usual)
• sleep changes (increased or decreased levels of sleep as well as difficulty falling or staying asleep)
• decrease in energy levels, lethargy
• ongoing feelings of worthlessness and guilt
• difficulty making decisions
• thoughts of death or suicide or harmful behaviors (If you are currently struggling with suicidal thoughts or behaviors please call the suicide hotline at 988. You are not alone, I believe in you.)

If you experience depression you may feel all of these things, have a few, or face things I haven’t even included on the list.

Clinically speaking, you must have these things for at least 2 weeks before being diagnosed.

My Experience

Depression is something that I have dealt with for most of my life. In high school I found myself often feeling alone even amidst many friends and family.

I was diagnosed my first year of college after a particularly bad few months involving compulsive movie/TV watching, weight gain, and very low mood.

In Multiple Sclerosis, the autoimmune disease I have, there is a 40% prevalence of depression amongst patients. One reason for this is because it’s difficult to accept that you have a crippling disease. The bigger reason is that damage to your brain causes depressive symptoms. This is something shown by traumatic brain injuries.

Help

There ARE things that will help. In my experience it is a constant battle, but one that is worth fighting. Here are some things that have helped me.

• CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy): Therapy of any kind is often helpful
• Medication
• Exercise
• A healthy diet
• EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing)
• Meditation
• Blue light therapy

There are many other things out there that can be beneficial, but there are also things that can be harmful. Any kind of numbing behavior be it drugs, alcohol, food, or media worsens depression in the long run.

If you are struggling and need a listening ear or help finding a good therapist I am here for you. Reach out to me at msandmo123@gmail.com and I will get back to you as soon as I can.

The post Depression Does Not Mean There is No Hope first appeared on MS and Mo.

Meditation is the practice of focusing your attention with the goal of bringing calm, energy, and awareness.

Let me first tell the how of meditation and then we’ll go into the why — I will cover those 5 health benefits I mentioned in the title.

How to meditate

The most common practice of meditation is to choose a place to quietly sit, without outside distractions, and redirect your attention to one thing. Some people focus on their breath while others choose to focus on an object or a word/phrase.

Another meditation method is while performing a repetitive task or moving in a slow controlled manner i.e. during yoga or tai chi (source).

The method you choose doesn’t matter. The thing that is important is the actual practicing. Remember that your mind will inevitably wander. Bring yourself back to your chosen focus. The act of refocusing your attention and leaning towards peace stretches the brain and allows your body to feel more at ease.

Let me now tell you why it matters.

Health benefits of meditation

Meditation has many health benefits and I am choosing to highlight only 5 of them. At the end of this post I included 3 sources that you can view if you’re interested in learning about additional health benefits.

These benefits are:

1. Stress Reduction (Link to when I talked about the effect of stress on inflammation)
2. Decreased impact and frequency of anxious thoughts
3. Improved mental performance
4. Stronger immune system
5. Better sleep as well as having a simpler time getting out of bed in the morning.

To bring it all together, there are many benefits of even 5 minutes of meditation a day. I know that when I meditate regularly I am less irritable and am better able to experience joy. But don’t just take my word for it. Try it yourself. Take a minimum of 10 seconds today to bring your attention to your breath and see how it makes you feel.

Source 1, Source 2, Source 3

The post 5 Health Benefits of 5 Minutes of Meditation first appeared on MS and Mo.

Today’s recipe is for gluten-free gingerbread cookies! If you missed last month’s recipe you can find it here.

In my mind, Christmas and cookies go together. Most especially, gingerbread cookies.

To make these cookies I bought gingerbread men cookie cutters, silicone baking sheets, and a rolling pin. I did this for simplicity’s sake, but I have often used a floured glass as a rolling pin that has working quite well.

I was also impatient, and instead of refrigerating the dough I put it in the freezer for 20 minutes. Heh heh. It probably would have worked better with the full refrigeration time. Be that as it may, it DID work pretty well as long as I used my smallest cookie cutter. The dough was fairly sticky (Again. Likely a result of my impatience) and didn’t do well coming off the spatula as I plopped the cookie dough men onto the baking sheet. This gave me a good number of one-armed, headless, or one-legged gingerbread men.

All in all, I would still call it a success because they taste great and will make a perfect addition to any Christmas Party.

Squat

1. Stand with your feet about hip width or a little wider with your toes facing front.

2. Send your hips back—bending at the knees and ankles

3. Sit into a squat position while keeping heels and toes on the ground, chest up and shoulders back. Be sure your knees stay above your ankles, or at least don’t move past your toes.

4. Press into your heels and straighten legs to return to a standing upright position.

The post 1 Easy Recipe + 1 Simple Exercise first appeared on MS and Mo.

I look at the clock and see that it is 4:30. Dinner is once again upon us and I have no plan. I scramble for my “go-to’s,” nachos, quesadillas, and frozen pizza. Yes we are fed, which is a major success. But leaving meal decisions to the last minute piles unnecessary stress on me as well as reduces the level of nutrition in what we eat.

One solution to this problem? Meal planning!

When you’re trying to make meals happen while also taking care of children things can get hectic. Add in a chronic illness of some sort and it gets even worse due to fatigue, pain, or other daily symptoms.

I personally have some cognitive difficulties when it comes to making decisions and planning, so it is much simpler for me to have a plan in place for me to follow.

There are people who have a monthly calendar that stays the same for each month. Weekly calendars, batch cooking, etc.

Meal Planning with a Weekly Calendar

What most often works for me is a weekly calendar.

I don’t use this exact calendar, but I do use something similar.

The meal that is the most troublesome for me is dinner, so a calendar like this works great.

I have found that it’s best for me to plan the fruit or vegetable along with the main dish. This helps me to use our produce in a timely fashion.

Side note about that, it’s almost embarrassing how many times we buy something just to end up having to throw it away. Meal planning can reduce food waste!

Meal Planning With Batch Cooking

I’ve never tried batch cooking in large part because it seems overwhelming. If you are unfamiliar with what it is, it is exactly what it sounds like.

You choose a day to be your “cooking day” and make a large amount of something. It could be hamburger, rice, or anything your heart desires. A benefit of this is that on the days other than your cooking day meal prep doesn’t take as long because some elements of the meal are already prepared.

An example: On your cooking day you make rice. That night for dinner you have Swedish meatballs over rice. The next day you have stir fry. The day after that you eat ham fried rice.

So you can see the benefit of this method. Writing this post is convincing me that I need to try batch cooking. So perhaps in the future I will add to this post about my experience with it.

Barriers to Meal Planning

There are always barriers when it comes to making plans, and I’m going to bring up just a few that have made things difficult for me.

The effort it takes to plan ahead, finding a time to actually plan, remembering what groceries we have, and thinking of meals to make.

The effort takes care of itself when I get to the planning stage, so when I’ve been successful at meal planning I’ve chosen a time on Saturday to plan the meals for the following week. That allows me to check what groceries we have and then make a trip to the store if necessary.

I’ve also found that having a list of potential meals has made things simpler for me. In the past I’ve tried planning out meals for the whole month, and that is nice because it reduces the number of times you have to sit down and plan as well as having a month full of possible meals that are organized.

Conclusion

Meal Planning is one way to reduce the stress that can come from cooking meals for a family. As I’ve mentioned in a previous post, it is always best to reduce stress due to the inflammatory effect on the body, especially when you have a chronic illness.

What works for you? Comment below with your meal planning method or what method you want to try.

As for me, I will try the batch cooking.

The post When you’re a mom, meal planning is the bomb first appeared on MS and Mo.